time to practice

i haven’t made music that i like since i got married!  I poured every last ounce of my musical energies into writing love songs that would get Diana to marry me, and then we got married, and now i can’t write anything that doesn’t suck.  THAT IS, UNTIL NOW!

Why now?  because i’m watching anime, and if anime does anything, it does this:  it clearly portrays the message “Don’t give up!  Do your best!  ra ra ra!  let’s save the world!” or at least the happy go lucky anime that i watch tends to portray those things.  Is there anything quite as exciting as crazy-fast J-pop hyper-actively crashing around intensely screamed japanese dialogue?  is there anything quite as awesome as japanese lyrics translating poorly into english, and making no sense at all?  no!  there is nothing better then this!  what an expression of pure joy!  The closest english equivalent of the pure joy such an experience brings is the live-action (well, kind of) remake of speed racer that came out in 2008.  That movie is probably the best at taking what anime and manga are and putting it on screen, in english, and trying to make it accessible for all… though the visual style may give you a headache if it isn’t in high-def.

So!  writing some music, watching speed racer… day off = planned!

my kneeees

 

Yesterday i helped a friend move into their new house!  this morning, i played tennis at 6:30.  now, as i type this at 9:09 am, my knees have decided to embrace the death they had coming.  it’s not as dramatic as i make it out to be, but my knees are a little sore.  here’s a mark twain quote that inspired this little drawing:

All say, “How hard it is that we have to die” – a strange complaint to come from the mouths of people who have had to live.  ~Mark Twain

that’s not what nintendo would have us believe

 

this actually has nothing to do with mario brothers, and everything to do with how ridiculous your mind starts to get when you read and watch a lot of high fantasy set in medieval type realms.  I literally googled “beasts of old” and then realized how ridiculous it is to use that phrase in a google search bar.  it might as well of been “beasts of yore” or “how to bleed bad blood with leaches”.  In any case, i felt super old yesterday when I made reference to printing stuff off of the internet, and one of my youth gave me a puzzled look.  people don’t need to print off the internet anymore.  Also:  Nintendo!  take responsibility!  don’t train our youngins to run to plumbers for help with supernatural phenomena.  plumbers don’t fight dinosaurs.  beasts of old..

to what end?

To what end indeed.  Yesterday, i offended my indian reader, and i apologize; your food, while delicious, absolutely causes havoc in my body.  it’s not a joke, so much as a fact that i find amusing.  Today:  If any of you are polka lovers, i apologize for the popular demise of your favourite genre of music… fear not:  wedding dances across the nation are still riddled with polka flavour…. and i’m sure there’s an XM radio station that plays all polka all the time.

sometimes, I wonder why I draw every day.  to what end?  is the goal to be famous some day, cause as much fun as that would be, I am incredibly uncomfortable with most of what fame would require.  Is it the gratification of knowing I can put to paper anything I imagine? cause that’s a bit of a bottomless pit, there’s no end to that.  hmm.

 

It all depends on how you define adventure

there are plenty of dangerous foods in the world.  I INTEND TO EAT THEM ALL.
**Roll intro- ADVENTURE EATS with IRON CHEF ROB SHAUF**
(then make me a cheque for a million dollars for a great idea for a TV show.)

 

I LOVE tennis.

I absolutely love tennis.  I’m not great at it, but I do enjoy it.  There is something so graceful, and yet so incredibly violent about it.  You can’t play tennis angry and expect to be any good, or at least i can’t.  And even though it’s incredibly frustrating, it will only get worse if a person doesn’t keep their cool.  AND!  The way it feels when a hit lines up perfectly, and you can feel the spin of the ball as it hits the racket, and the follow through, like swinging a sword that shoots a bullet, oh man!  There’s nothing like it.  I wonder if that’s how they came up with gunblades in final fantasy 8?  Some japanese guy playing tennis was like “Hoah! this could work.”
If I ever become a millionaire, or a billionaire, the first thing I would do is buy a thrift store, and give a baseball bat to my wife, and let her destroy the glass section.  She’s always wanted to do that.  As I hope this comic communicates, I think it would be awesome to practice my tennis serve in a sport chek… or a mall food court.  Of course i’ll never do it, I don’t want to go to jail or hurt anyone, but I mean, if I were a billionaire, I could rent a store for a day and just go nuts.
Anyways, I always like doing comics without dialogue!  This is one of my favourite ones i’ve ever made.

If you can’t beat em, join em.

FREAKING BIRDS, MAN.  They’re watching our every move!  No wonder JRR Tolkien chose them as SPIES for the ENEMY in his BOOK you may have HEARD OF IT it’s called LORD OF THE FLIES.  i mean RINGS.  CAPS.
Anyways, owls are crazy ferocious killing machines, nature’s equivalent of a stealth fighter.  Lets all pause to give those creeps a moment of our thoughts…  When they fly, their feathers are genetically designed to make AS LITTLE WIND NOISE AS POSSIBLE, and to human ears, their flying makes no noise we can hear.  I saw that on a documentary on discovery channel, so it’s a FACT.  My question is this:  WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WHEN THEY TURN ON THE REST OF CIVILIZATION.  Sure, they’re on everything cutesy these days…  Cutely drawn owls, all to desensitize us to this impending owl threat.  Silent wings require silent methods!  POISON.  let’s poison owls.
Okay, that got a little out of hand.  Don’t poison owls.  Don’t ever!  they’re majestic, and you will go to jail.  But they ARE kinda creepy, sitting there with their necks that can turn around all the way.  -shudder-  again, don’t poison owls.  it was a joke.