Local Expert

I really am a bit of an expert at most things, and if you don’t believe me, all you gotta do is ask Diana.

For some reason arranging a room has always given me a LOT of satisfaction even though I’m pretty terrible at it (according to people who actually have taste when it comes to these sorts of things). My lay outs always have their own type of logic to them, it’s just that they’re only logical to me. In my humble opinion, my logic is the best kind of logic. By far.

Also, I find “local expert” to be funny. Sort of like, “in the region, this is all we could come up with.” It reeks of resignation! Is the person an expert or not? Locally, I’m great at sports (if “local” is defined narrowly enough). The people in my complex can’t do anything against my killer tennis serve! LOCAL EXPERT.